Introvert/Extrovert?

Thought I wasn't coming back, did you? Well, here I am again, still. I feel like a pillow that has been sat upon too long and at long last, everyone has gone home and I am free to expand to my own natural form again.

When I was a child, the most frequent admonishment I heard was "Sie nicht so utjeloaten!" roughly translated as "Don't be so extroverted." My mother was an introvert of the most introverted kind, my mother-in-law was introverted and so was my husband's older sister to whom he was very close. None of them were good at expressing their feelings or accepting themselves as they were. My husband married me because I was different from his mother and then spent the rest of our married life trying to fit me into the mold of the women he was familiar with, repressed, quiet, unable to speak up for themselves or cope in a world where there wasn't a male protector to look after them. When I expressed opinions, he tried to shush me, my clothes were too bright colored for his taste, my friends not to his taste and so it went. He flourished in an environment where he could socialize, be the center of attention as an actor in dinner theatre and hold court at family dinners where his stories and his voice dominated. I was, however, to take the place of the adoring mother and sister who had raised him and was forever, a square peg in a round hole. Now, he no longer speaks and I am free, free at last to be an extrovert if that is indeed who I am. Do introverts love red, and large social gatherings, and laughter and loud music? Do introverts want to meet everyone in the place and put a name on everyone in the congregation at church? Do introverts speak up regularly in public meetings and feel quite comfortable leading meetings and suggesting ideas? I had always considered myself an introvert until I read a book about young children and how they express their introversion and extroversion very early in life. I may have been mislabelled by others who tried to mold me into their own acceptable pattern. Good-bye, introvert! Hello, ME! World, here I come. The real me is emerging, somewhat hesitantly, but definitely, no more watching words or actions in case I offend my husband or his family, no more concern over what will my mother think. I am my own person now. I hope my children always feel free to be their own persons as well. I could wish nothing better for them because they are not me and I am not them. One of them is an extrovert, (the one who always clashed with her father) and the other two are introverts. The introverts have a difficult time understanding the extrovert but oh, how I love watching her swing dance with her husband. That's living!